Things Women Judge Each Other For, But We All Do

[caption id="attachment_831143" align="alignleft" width="1068"] Bigstockphoto.com/Two women with laptop and coffee and donuts[/caption] Chalk it up to our cavewomen blood that needs to know what everyone’s up to so we can protect our babies, but women like to know and discuss what other women are up to. Every boyfriend I’ve ever had—I’ve listened to him and his friends talk over drinks. If one guy brings up another friend who isn’t there, the conversation might go something like, “Is he still with his girlfriend?” “Yup.” “Is he still trying to get her to move to Florida with him?” “I guess so.” “Got it.” And it was over! Can you believe that? I don’t know if it’s that we just care more about our friends or talking is especially good for our health but if women discuss a friend who may be moving across country for a man, that topic could take over the entire night. But sometimes, we can be a bit judgmental, too. Here are things women judge each other for, but all do. [caption id="attachment_702085" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Spending more time with his friends

When a woman gets a new boyfriend, she can sometimes spend a little more time with his friends than he spends with hers. It could be that men are a little less willing to go out of their comfort zones and try the activities their partners and their friends do. Women usually give their friends a hard time for not pushing their partners to come out with the girls more.       [caption id="attachment_703564" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Getting emotionally involved too quickly

We act as if we don’t all get a little too excited a little too quickly after a few dates go well with somebody. And when our friends do that, we come in with the, “You’re going to get hurt! Don’t you think you’re getting ahead of yourself?!” committee.           [caption id="attachment_625898" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Sharing Google calendars with our boos

We all like to pretend we have the “I’ll see my boyfriend whenever I see him” mentality, until we have a new boyfriend. Then we make sure we see that man. We’re sharing Google calendars and not making any separate plans until we’ve confirmed with boo.     [caption id="attachment_713648" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Being calorie-conscious

Around our friends, we all say, “Eat the cookie! Finish the pizza! Don’t be silly! You’re so thin!” At home we take out our little food scales and measure out ounces of cereal and cheese.             [caption id="attachment_695316" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Exercising on vacation

Nobody wants to admit it, but everybody’s feeling a little bad about doing nothing but laying by the pool and drinking pina coladas on this vacation. So when one woman suggests, “A quick jog!” everyone rolls their eyes…but then they all go on the jog.             [caption id="attachment_620621" align="alignleft" width="425"] Corbis[/caption]

Friends with benefits that are more

None of us can control what our hearts feel! We’ve all been in a friends with benefits situation or a booty call relationship that we deep down wanted more from, and wouldn’t admit it. But when our friends do this, we judge them for taking that 2 am booty call.           [caption id="attachment_610385" align="alignleft" width="500"] Corbis Images[/caption]

Letting our partners pay for us

Anybody who has been in a long-term relationship knows that the finances of the two individuals can fluctuate. There will be times when one person just pays a little more of the rent because the other just got a pay cut, or one person pays for all the movie tickets because they just make way more money. But when we see our friend’s boyfriend paying more than half the rent, we raise an eyebrow. Judging!         [caption id="attachment_699419" align="alignleft" width="469"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Gossiping

We will talk about how bad it is that so-and-so talks about other people so much. Wait a minute…But aren’t we? Isn’t this? Nah. Doesn’t count as gossip. Right?                 [caption id="attachment_712971" align="alignleft" width="413"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Not speaking up more

Whether it’s to a colleague, boss or boyfriend, we’ve all shied away when we should have stood up for ourselves. And then we’ve all had girlfriends criticize us for not being bolder. As if we are oblivious to the sexist culture going on in a lot of workplaces that makes it, honestly, not as easy for women to speak up as it is for men.         [caption id="attachment_696788" align="alignleft" width="416"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Staying in dead-end relationships

Raise your hand if you’ve never stayed in a relationship past its expiration date. Everyone with their hands up are liars. We all do this and yet, we get amnesia about it when we see our friends doing it, and call them weak or scared.         [caption id="attachment_616018" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Not taking career risks

Again, we’re all out there in the trenches—we know how much harder it is for a woman to just ask for a raise or a loan or a promotion or a recommendation. We know the BS women often tolerate when they do this, like receiving sexual advances with the promise of a promotion or being called a b*tch for even wanting one! But we’ll scorn our friends who don’t boldly take these risks every day. Not fair.         [caption id="attachment_715557" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Binge eating

“I’m really worried about Liz. I think she’s developing a binge eating problem. She’s not handling her breakup well and she’s turning to food” we say on the phone, with three family size chip bags on our laps.             [caption id="attachment_716483" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Talking about men too much

We probably fail the Bechdel test more than we’d like to admit. But here’s a little secret: men talk about women when they’re together a lot too! So let’s not be so hard on ourselves. Sex and love are two of the hottest topics, and they always will be. It’s human nature.           [caption id="attachment_708518" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Choosing family over work

Many women say they’ll never leave their jobs to raise children (usually in reference to a woman who just did this). But all rules go out the window when you experience the life-changing event of being responsible for another human being’s life. And realizing how meaningless, in comparison, spreadsheets really are.         [caption id="attachment_713311" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Being mean to our moms

We love to tell each other to be nicer to our moms. Right after we got off a phone call with our moms that involved quite a few explicit words. But you have an excuse to be mean to yours, right? Mmmhmm.             [caption id="attachment_714826" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Talking about dieting/exercise

He that is without sin among you, let him (her) cast the first stone…The moment one woman says, “Ugh. I feel fat today” or “I wish I was skinny like so-and-so” everyone jumps down her throat for negative body talk. But we have all been the one to bring it up.             [caption id="attachment_703166" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Sleeping through some stuff

Sleeping with men to get through some stuff. Who hasn’t turned to sex to recover from a breakup, loss of a job, loss of a loved one…? It’s easy to suggest healthier ways to get over something when you aren’t the one in the middle of a crisis.             [caption id="attachment_721349" align="alignleft" width="455"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Taking forever to get ready

We all have secret vanity routines that take longer and cost more than they should. Of course, we don’t tell each other that when we’re complaining that we’re late because Rebecca is still doing her hair.           [caption id="attachment_611722" align="alignleft" width="500"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Leaving the group for a guy

If you found a guy with whom you were totally hitting it off at a bar, you would probably disappear from your group of girlfriends, too. But when you don’t, then you criticize the woman who does this.       [caption id="attachment_625047" align="alignleft" width="427"] Corbis[/caption]

Obsessing over breakups

Every woman thinks that her friend is taking too long to get over a breakup. No woman has ever gotten over a breakup quick enough in the eyes of her girlfriends. That includes you.

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